The Hanged Man  - A Lesson In Ego

A card of suspension, letting go of ego, and sacrifice.

(Let me set the stage)… I had been badly injured from a car accident about three years before starting to create The Naked Heart Tarot. During the on-going recovery phase my spiritual journey took a major turn, and my whole being, every cell in my body was waking up bringing me closer and closer to my path. But, I will save those details for another story.

Over the last couple of years, my injuries had progressively got worse and had got to the point they left me bed ridden for quite a few months, and I could only walk with crutches. I essentially didn’t have really any use of my left leg.

Thankfully as an Artist I embraced this incredible gift the universe was offering me to stop and slow down. So that’s what I did, and I started channelling and creating as much artwork as I possibly could; pouring myself into the original Naked Heart Tarot.

When I first started creating The Naked Heart Tarot it was in black and white ink. I had finished all the major Arcana cards, but one! While I was working on the last few cards, a voice inside my head kept saying “I want to work in colour, I want to work in colour” and over the next few days, it kept getting louder and more persistent.

To get the voice to shut up, I decided I would feed it. So I took a break from the deck and decided to do something in colour. As a painter, my natural instinct was to paint, but because I couldn’t sit/stand in the position to do so, I had to come up with something else. So I chose a new medium, and pulled out some pencil crayons to do a drawing in colour for fun.

When the colour drawing was complete I felt satisfied and realized I loved working with pencil crayons! Who know?! (my higher self did, that's who)

I had just finished designing and drawing The Hanged Man before I took a break, and I returned to the deck with new focused energy.

I was excited to see what the cards would look like when they were made small to fit the size of a regular tarot deck. So, I made a few scans of the art and started to scale them down. To my surprise the cards would not scale down to the proper size of a tarot deck. My original calculations I had made for the artwork were totally incorrect. My proportions were way off! This meant I would have to redo every Marjor Arcana card I had already produced. I sat there with my head in my hands staring at The Hanged Man. How could I have made this error after spending months upon months working on these cards! Then something came over me, a calm and settling feeling letting me know that the work was not a waste, and now was not the time to panic.

And just like The Hanged Man. I let go of my ego that was attached to my creations, knowing in my heart, and with all my soul, this was my life path, and the universe was not steering me in any direction except closer to my divine purpose.

And, that voice that had been calling to me asking me to create in colour, just got one-hundred times louder. So, that’s exactly what I did. I took my ink drawings and merged them with colour, and that is how the style of the Naked Heart Tarot was born.

Like the Hanged Man, not sure what the solution was, I was suspended in time; which allowed me to let go of what I thought should be. This gave me time to reflect on what was created and how I could expand my creation for the greater good.  It allowed me to accept my present situation and surrender my need for control.

My heart remains thankful for this moment in time, and to this day, even though I know my everything has been put into each and every card I have created. The Hanged Man is my favourite card in The Naked Heart Tarot.  It moves me to tears thinking about it. 

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